Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Baby Stuff

Monday, June 2nd, 2008

So, this whole nesting thing is both fun and furiating.  While shopping for products to ensure that the baby will not be naked nor starved nor murdered in its sleep by the dog, it has become obvious that we are parents-to-be of rare and expensive tastes.

  • 97.3% of all baby clothing, bed linens, and accessories are only manufactured in pastel colors printed with teddy bears and clouds.  This is where the bargains are.
  • 2.1% come in drab “mod” colors: dull aqua, dirty orange, and brown. 
  • .5% come in white.
  • .1% come in nice primary colors or other festive “gender neutral” colors and prints.

Those of you who know us well know that we mostly go for the last category.  What’s wrong with a little turqoise?  Lime green?  Why must all yellows be pastel?  Why does black only come with “punk” or “alternative” adornments, like screen-printed anarchy symbols?  And what about a nice grass green?  Solid colors aside, what about a nice geometric pattern?  Though I don’t entirely agree with the sentiment, this is a cute shirt.

I do understand that the baby will not care what color he or she is wearing or sleeping on, but I don’t want to buy things that are ugly.  Thank goodness for loaners and hand-me-downs!  Right now, free and used are my favorite colors.

Another lesson learned is that many Amazon reviewers are not too bright.  Sample reviews below are paraphrased:

  • In a review for a mini-gym thing, in which a baby lies on its back and bats at little toys hanging from an arch:  My 1-week old daughter was not interested in this AT ALL.  It’s supposed to entertain her but she just went to sleep!!!  I RETURNED IT!!!
  • In a review for some baby spoons:  My 6-week old spits up everything we try to feed him with this spoon,  DO NOT BUY!!!
  • In reviews for many, many products:  We do not own this product, and have neither used it nor seen it in person, but it is terrible!!!
  • Also in reviews for many, many products:  I do not have children, but I bought this for a friend whose baby is due in three months.  She hasn’t even taken it out of the box yet, but it is super cute and durable, and will last the baby forever!!!
  • In a review for a baby swing:  I only gave it one star because zero stars is not an option!!!  We ordered this for our fussy baby upon the recommendation of a friend, and it took FOUR DAYS to arrive!!!  We’d already purchased a swing locally by then, and so we returned this unopened!!! DO NOT BUY!!!
  • In a review for a small (but seriously, not that small) fabric/plastic toy that clips onto a stroller or whatever:  WARNING!!!  My son shoved this hard and jammed it way into his mouth and made a gagging sound!!! This product is DANGEROUS!!! DO NOT BUY!!!  

Sigh.

You might be happy to know that a post about knitting and yarn is pending, as is some more stuff from my house.

Bump day?

Wednesday, May 21st, 2008

This week, my uterus is all kinds of popping up and out of my pelvis. It ain’t just bloat anymore, baby!

This is just in time for Baskin Robbins Bump Day, which I will not be participating in. You might notice that this offer is only good in certain states, of which Maryland is not one, and you can see my previous post for information on my current views on ice cream. Also, this is kinda interesting.

Things That I Don’t Care For

Monday, May 12th, 2008

Eternal dislikes: 

  • Daylight Savings Time
  • Mushrooms
  • Artificial sweeteners
  • Open wounds
  • Pus
  • Mucous
  • Meat in aspic
  • Lotions and soaps that smell like candy
  • Washing dishes
  • Getting out of bed
  • Soda
  • The Mall
  • Wearing a bra

Recently acquired dislikes:

  • Pregnancy hormones
  • Red meat
  • Ice cream
  • Dairy
  • Scrambled eggs
  • Marinara sauce
  • Showering
  • Carrying things
  • Walking faster than a slow crawl
  • Minty foods and candies
  • Salad (comes and goes)
  • Being nekkid
  • Going braless

 

 

Thanks

Wednesday, May 7th, 2008

So thanks for your kind thoughts and stuff. Pregnancy sux, so far, and niceness goes a long ways with me these days. Makes me all teary, even. I got a little care package in the mail from a friend and bust into tears because it was just so thoughtful.

I was all set to come home from work and tell you about Sheep & Wool and my anniversary gift from Matt, but now I’m all tired and shit. Instead, I offer you this: you know those little trash cans in the stalls of ladies rooms? Today, at work, there was an empty coke can shoved in there. Nice.

Birthday Update

Monday, April 28th, 2008

So our sweet nephew turned 1 in early March.  Not only did I make him a teddy bear, but I also helped his Mama make his cake:

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He liked the cake, and had all sorts of fun at the party:

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Knitting Update

Saturday, April 26th, 2008

Juno

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Weather got warm and I decided that since I won’t be able to wear it until next Winter, that I should just go ahead and start on a

Cropped Cardigan with Leaf Ties

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using some Springy Cotton Ease in Terracotta.   I had a tough time choosing a size, since the neckline may meet at your boobs or underneath them, depending on your height and boob location.

And I finally frogged the ugly, ugly Monkey socks and got to work on something much simpler:

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I don’t think this yarn colorway would work on anything more complicated than simple stockinette.  This is the ballband sock pattern that came with the yarn (Colinette Jitterbug), except with a modified round toe.

So that’s where things stand for the moment.  Note that both cardigans have been banished to the “bad knitting” corner, for reasons entirely unrelated to the items themselves.  Well, kinda related.  I’ve got a few other things in the works that I’ll share with you anon.

A Friendly Warning

Wednesday, April 2nd, 2008

Hi.  I’m not dead.  I’m still knitting.  There are still things in my house. 

While you wait (or not) for real content, please enjoy the Ped Egg.  My warning is this: do not watch the Ped Egg commercial.  ESPECIALLY if you like parmesan cheese.  Trust me on this.

Today…Ugh

Wednesday, February 27th, 2008
  1. my first migraine
  2. lost a stone from my wedding ring

Ew.

Thursday, February 14th, 2008
You Are a Soy Latte
At your best, you are: free spirited, down to earth, and relaxed 

At your worst, you are: dogmatic and picky

You drink coffee when: you need a pick me up, and green tea isn’t cutting it

Your caffeine addiction level: medium

What Kind of Coffee Are You?

In the realm of coffee-based beverages, I can’t imagine anything worse than a soy latte.  I tried steaming some soymilk once at home and it ended up tasting like cornflakes.  Cornflakes with coffee is fine.  Cornflakes in coffee is gross.  I don’t even like cow milk lattes.  Call me crazy, but I like my coffee to taste like coffee.  If I am a soy latte, then I have no choice but to hate myself.  Sigh.  Guess it’s time for some self-flagellation.  Flagellation.  What a dumb word.  Sounds like flatulance, jell-o, and nation, all rolled into one.  Gross. 

Oh, look…That’s kind of like a heart in the foam.  Happy Valentines Day!

My Mom Is Awesome

Monday, February 11th, 2008

She knit me more socks!

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As soon as I sat down to take the picture, feet in the sun for good lighting, Toaster zoomed in.  Seriously, he was nowhere to be seen when I sat down.  I turned to reach for the camera and as I was turning back, felt a warm weight settle on my left foot.  I’m not sure what pattern she used, but that’s a fold-over cuff and the yarn is Knit Picks Risata.  Very comfortable!  I’ve so far worn them to work and for some duckpin bowling, and they performed beautifully in both cases.  Thanks, mom!